I am not a perfect wife. Oh, how I strive to be… but I fail. Constantly. And on one such occasion a few months ago, I had a conversation with my husband that has changed my relationship with him and with God ever since.
“How is it that you can still love me the way you do when I fail to treat you the way you deserve?”
“Easy. I said ‘Til death do us part’ not ‘Until you lose your temper and yell at me.'”
Then I had a thought that didn’t even leave my lips before God answered my heart (the way He tends to do).
“It would be easier to stop myself from treating you that way if I knew there was a chance I would lose you.”
To which God replied “But that’s the point. That’s what makes it love.”
You see, His love has no limits. No conditions. No “One last time and then I’ll…” God’s love is more thorough than that. More real. And that’s one of the things that makes it so hard for us to accept it. Because it’s easy for God to love us like that… He IS Love. I’m not so good at it, though.
I think we all feel that way sometimes. If we sin just one more time, God isn’t going to forgive us. We’ll blow it. He’ll pack up, disappear, and his love will never return to us. It’s what makes grace so impossible for us to grasp, and leaves us striving always to be “good enough.”
But the fact is, we aren’t. And we never will be. But He is.
So we’ll keep on failing our God. And He’ll keep loving us. And what makes it love, on our part at least, is that even though we know we’ll never lose his love, we will strive to be better. He will always love us anyway, but our love for Him will change our hearts, and out of the abundance of the heart our mouths will speak love and our actions will be love. We will begin to understand that goodness isn’t a process by which we are magically warped like play dough into the person God wants us to be… but a process by which we love God enough to become everything He wants for us.
If God’s love for us were conditional, it wouldn’t be love. If my husband’s love for me were conditional, it wouldn’t be love. This knowledge has me constantly examining whether my love is conditional, or real.
What are you learning to live right now?